I like making lists

Sometimes I want to make a list of all the damaging

And wrong

And backwards

And hurtful

And misguided

And incorrect

And horrible

things I was taught, specifically by

leaders

in the christian community.

But then

I get overwhelmed just thinking about how long that list would be.

Alrighty

Calling all generation X and the millennials:

If you can’t get gramma and grampa to vote for a non-white or non-testied, it’s time to lock the door from the outside when we vote.

If this upsets you, the vote probably won’t effect your life, and/or you’re voluntarily ignorant.

Harris 2024, or worsened fascism.

I came from women who held their pain behind their teeth,

women who shelved resentment on their collarbones,

women who used their anger to scrub the floors.

Those women paved my way,

and I won’t take it for granted.

Today I’d like to live in a hole in the dirt like a snake, or a mole, or a worm.

There’s so much to do with so little help and so much expectation.

I don’t even want to take a vacation because I have to fucking plan it.

When taking a break means sitting at home but home has even more unfinished tasks than work, I want to run away.

I get why women run away.

I tell her it’s going to be okay

I tell her it’s going to be okay

I tell her it’s going to be okay

I tell her it’s going to be okay

Someone tell me it’s going to

Be okay

I think there is a difference between feeling pretty

And being attractive

Too bad, we can really only have control over one of those things

Is there a wrong answer?

If I am defining myself as anything other than human,

am I then agreeing to the terms and

conditions

of the role that comes with the pronoun?

I deny that I am over thinking this.

As the controlling hand of greed becomes more and more available for our consumption…

the more and more we can see, and feel, and taste the poison that is a wealthy government.

Labels are not only made to divide, but to control.

That’s how I like my paperwork, but not my freedom.

So I guess the question becomes

what actually is, a pronoun?

Balance isn’t the zen experience I once idealized it to be. Balance is the light being as blinding as the dark is isolating. It’s the joy being as ever-soaring as the sadness is bottomless.

The nonsense as profound as the logic.

The pleasure as intense as the ache.

I think we have to accept this to achieve balance, if that’s what we’re on a path to seek.

It’s hard to accept.

Why do I find it so irritatingly hard to be

Vulnerable with one

Person, even the very closest one to me…

Yet

I can be so vulnerable

Here on a platform that I myself

Have made public for absolutely

Anyone to read

If they

Choose

When I say I don’t believe in the god written about in the Bible, I am not saying that I don’t believe your spiritual experiences.

I believe you. I have, also, had spiritual experiences. I don’t believe in the god written about by man. If you are offended by this, I want you to think about all the examples in the Bible that explain the flaws and agendas of man.

If I am to believe in a god, it certainly would not be one fed to me by the hands of man.