When it comes to a task at hand- I so strongly believe this that it has become a moral- it should be done to the best of the person’s ability, the first time.

When my kids do a task, and I can tell it’s half-assed, I come undone mentally. I have absolutely made the mistake of raising my voice and shaming them for the crappy attempt. I then apologize to them and feel like the worst human in the world. SO, that approach is no good. I have also made the mistake of just doing it correctly myself. What is that teaching them? At best it is teaching them that someone else will pick up the slack? At worst it’s teaching them I think they’re incapable? And of course, yes, I have gone with them to the task and calmly spoke to them about the importance of doing the best we can or communicating if we need help, time, or a break. That just never seems to stick. In one ear, out the other, and on the floor in a pile. Probably sticky.

Growing up, my best friend’s mom was so laid back. Her daughter’s would do their chores, and she would be happy with whatever they did. That was not my experience at any of my houses growing up. You did the job correctly, or you heard about  it. It seems I cared about the “hearing about it” as a kid, and my kids don’t. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. Maybe I’m raising kids that won’t be as consumed by how many spots are on the kitchen counter. Or maybe I’m raising hoarders. Do any of us know until the kid is a fully cooked adult? Maybe we don’t even know then. I used to keep a very, very clean house. Now that I’m so severely out numbered– I just cry in my own head multiple times a day.

I just want to live in a very clean and tidy home, and raise humans who are clean and tidy, too. I know that’s a big ask. Kids are gorgeous little messes.

My husband has gotten a smidgen better over the years, but has more shit now than he’s ever had before. He’s a hoarder at heart. We need a duplex.